Today I had an epiphany.

So I have this Baby Einstein music CD on my PS3, and I couldn't shake this feeling for the longest time about why xylophony versions of classical music seemed so creepy and familiar.

Then, I hit upon it.

This CD is basically like the entire soundtrack for "A Clockwork Orange."

Life is good.

It's not that I hate Christmas. . .

but really, we went to this house off of SE Belmont on Peacock Lane and that whole neighborhood is like psychotic. I have never seen such over-the-top Christmas decorations for crappy, run-down houses. We went to go to this estate sale there, and the person who owned it had an unhealthy lust for all things Father Christmas. It was just creepy as Fuuu.

The good news? We got two awesome baby pianos for like 30 bucks total. Nealon's going to party like it's 1999, y'all.

Little Coffee Shop of Horrors Dec. 2, 2009

Of course, you know I'm back at Southeast Grind when you overhear someone explaining to the register girl about reading people's energy as one of her psychic abilities. She's really good at it, by the way, or so she alleges.

I allege that I have a job. It doesn't make it true.

I Regret Trying to Get Work Done at a Coffeeshop.

I'd rather study at a truck stop. I think I'd fit in with the people there and could actually relate. I had to sit through an insufferable exchange between two young hippies who were performing some complicated fake-intellectual mating ritual. I have never heard so much continuous bullshit in my life, and really was torn between tearing my eyes and ears out or laughing my ass off. Some high points:

• She said it was hard to accept spiritual guidance from someone who broke her heart (talking about an ex who is still creepily trying to get back together).
  
  
• He knows the creator of hackysack. . . I mean, "footbag" because he lives in Oregon. He goes to Reed College to participate in some weekly "footbag" event, and was talking about how this awesome "footbag" guy has now made it into some kind of martial art. Seriously.
  
  
• Either he or she went to Halloween dressed as "a random act of kindness." I had a random act of aneurysm right there.
  
  
• Dick Cheney is the Penguin joke. QUACK QUACK.
  
  
• His name is Happiness (or some foreign language equivalent of it), "THOUGH NOT LEGALLY" BECAUSE YOU WOULD BE A MORON TO DO SO.
  
  
• We all love acupuncture! Yay we love random bits of Eastern culture because it makes us "educated."
  
  
• Something about a PC-version of Merriam Webster's where there are no anti-women references. I don't even know what that means.
  
  
• Oh I think we should live off the grid and barter our excess deer meat instead of CONSUMER CULTURE SMASH.
  
  
• Something about living in a hippie forest commune in the middle of Oregon.
  
  
• He doesn't have a cell phone anymore (DON'T YOU WANT TO GET CHICKS' NUMBERS?!!!!1! OMG worst reply to the question of "Do you have a phone number?" ever. This dude has NO self-preservation instinct) because people wouldn't answer his phone calls. *tear*

I am surprised that I got ANY work done after all of that pretentious posturing. They were SO in love with each other and themselves that the amplitude of the ridiculousness kept ratcheting up. It was funny at the end when he awkwardly tried to get her to play something on her guitar-like instrument and she was like, "Oh my acupuncture appointment." SERVED.

I've been reading too much Wonkette.

Today has taught me that I need to get a Rubric's Cube.

Sitting in the sole practitoner track is kind of scary... I've never felt the fear of failure and getting screwed so badly.

Lesson 2: Your legal staff will screw you over and you will be sanctioned.

Whenever the bar talks about paying lots of money for software, I thank my lucky stars I use open source software. I can't afford to be a high-powered attorney.

Today's CLE topic: Why It Was a Bad Choice to Become a Lawyer. The running theme seems to be that we are all going to be disbarred. Please let me survive, God.

Just met with an attorney who does software licensing work here in PDX. If anyone has any leads on how to get in the door, I would totally appreciate it.

Best of the Best: Google Voice

As I've commented to Rachel and perhaps a few others, I find that Google Voice's voicemail transcription service is a pretty interesting way to determine how clearly a person is able to enunciate. Until today, I had not managed to get a perfect transcription, whether it was due to signal interference or people talking at a non-optimal volume, speed, etc. The closest I got was with Josh, which I randomly attribute to the speaking skills necessary to be an effective psychologist. There were only two words that got mis-transcribed in his 18-second voicemail to go see Starts No Exit, but were minor enough that it didn't really alter the grammatical structure or understanding of the entire message. Great job, Josh!

However, the honor of perfect transcription goes to my dad, for his short, 7-second voicemail he gave me today briefly telling me to call him back. When I caught the SMS notification with transcription, it just seemed impossible that there could have been an error, and upon playing back the message, I was pleasantly surprised. Hopefully, this phenomena won't be extremely rare, and either Google or my friends and family will step up to make transcription more useful to me in the future (because sometimes, the messages are just too ridiculous).

Analogies That Just Don't Work: 10/22/2009

One of the benefits of being unemployed is that you get to spend a lot of your day nitpicking things that people with jobs and money would never waste their time with. In the spirit of this personal hell I live in, I am excited to announce a new category of posts here on Cheap Talk, "Analogies That Just Don't Work." Each time I publish an ATJDW post, I will over-analyze the use of an analogy in an article that provides an unintended and/or ironic consequence.

Today's article comes courtesy of Gizmodo, a gadgets and tech blog. Now, I will paraphrase the article (really a stub) so that I don't unintentionally take away any traffic from their blog. In commenting on a user survey of Windows 7 they noted that 80% of Mac users stated they would recommend Windows 7 for their friends and family. Afterwards, the poster analogizes:

Of course, just 'cause I tell my mom this minivan would perfect for her doesn't mean I'd actually drive one.

Regardless of how one feels about Windows v. Mac (I personally like both and would like to dual-boot it on my netbook some day), this is a perfect example of how an otherwise appropriate analogy does not "work" in this context. Remember that one of the core talking points of MacOS X is its user-friendly and hassle-free experience, epitomized in their Mac and PC Guy ads. By contrast, the common understanding of the Windows experience is that it subjects users to a litany of problems, from viruses to BSODs.

Comparing the 80% recommendation to telling your mom that a minivan would be "perfect for her" therefore fails because it strangely implies that Windows 7 is better geared toward non-computer-saavy users than Macs. A minivan screams "usefulness," especially for a mom who may have to shuttle kids around, carry large amount of groceries, or just want the safety of a larger-mass vehicle.

What would this poster "actually drive," and how is it different from a minivan? Are we comparing this to a sports car or a motorcycle? If so, the analogy still only partially works. Even if we give the benefit of the doubt that MacOS X provides a smoother, flashier experience, it still ignores the core problem in distinguishing Windows 7 as the useful, everyman's OS from Mac OS X as meant for power users or the statistical outliers of computer users. What a strange world we live in now if this is true.

Surprising law school-related news story.

Today, I was catching up on my RSS feeds and saw this article about how a person who notified authorities with information leading to the capture of a rapist gave his award to the victim of the crime. Despite the tragedy of the underlying crime, it was really a prime example of true selflessness toward others. Upon closer reading, however, I also noticed this tidbit about the suspect:

Jakub Tomczak, a Polish national, was found guilty of rape and causing grievous bodily harm at Exeter Crown Court in January last year and was given two life sentences to be served in Poland.

The 25-year-old, who was a law student at the time, had been on a night out in the city, and his movements were tracked by CCTV camera.

Sometimes law school fails to teach how to follow the law, I guess.

Moving to Sellwood!

Yesterday, we got a call from the realtors at Bluestone & Hockley that our applications for our new place were accepted. We will be moving in by the end of this month to Sellwood with our good friend and past roommate/babysitter Brooke. A one year lease with a large backyard, washer and dryer, and a nice neighborhood! All for LESS than what we pay now.

P.S.: The position is still open. . . things are getting interesting!

Job Hunt, Revisited. . .

Just turned in an app today. . . I don't even know if the position is still open, since it's been a whole month. At least now I know I will be an attorney, which is what they are looking for. Also, it would seem like a perfect fit for me in terms of a career. Two bad points:

1) It is in California (so I will have to make some hard family decisions if by some miracle I get it).

2) My luck is terrible in regard to "perfect fits." C'est la vie, I suppose.

I'm just standing in front of my car, waiting for Rachel to get me some foil before heading out to cook at Rob's. Hopefully I don't screw this up!

Steak (delicious)

Steak is the reason why I'll never be vegetarian. Today's steak: salt, pepper, paprika, dried chives, and chipotle mustard. Sear 1 minute/side, broil 2 minutes/side. Delish.

P.S.: I think I will make a steak tag from now on.

Today Is A Dead Zone

There will be no posts today, in respect of you-know-what. Good luck to all.

Please Let This Become Reality

The Microsoft Courier. . . this looks way better than what the Apple tablet is presumably going to be, and more in the line of what I want to do as a graphic designer. Click the link!

I will pay good money for this.

Steak and Potatoes

Perhaps one of the fundamentals that every good cook should have down pat, the humble steak and potatoes provides an ample canvas for people to paint with, using herbs, spices, sauces, and whatever tickles their fancy. However, my dad (and any chef worth his salt) stresses that making a good steak requires only salt, pepper, paprika and oil (in addition to a really super cut of beef). As for the potatoes, both he and I are generally roasters, but I decided to go a different route by semi-poaching my potatoes and carrots (yes, we do need vegetables sometimes) in butter, followed by white wine. Here's the simple recipe I had (thanks to Fred Meyer for their reduced value steak, since I'd never purchase steak loin at $15.99/lb).

Seared and Broiled Steak

(serves 2)

2 4 oz. loin steak.

Salt

Pepper

Paprika

Pre-heat your oven to broil. Let your cast-iron pan heat up on high heat until very hot, then add olive oil (it should not smoke, but you should see a few wisps). Season both sides of your steaks, then sear each side for one minute each. Then, place the pan in the oven, broiling for a total of four minutes, turning the steak every minute. Remove steak and wrap it in foil to cook with the residual heat for five minutes. Serve. Comes out medium, medium-rare.

Butter and White-White Poached Potatoes and Carrots

(serves 2)

2 small to medium sized russet potatoes, peeled

1 carrot

1 shallot, chopped

3-4 tablespoons butter

some leftover white wine

sage, chopped chiffonade

chives, chopped

Place your sauce pan on medium to medium low heat to melt two tablespoons of the butter. Add the shallot and sage first to saute. Then add your potatoes and carrots, making sure not to crisp or sear. Cook it at medium heat, adding the rest of the butter. Leave covered for about ten minutes. Afterwards, turn heat up to high and pour in your white wine, enough to leave a layer of liquid, but not even close to submerging the root vegetables. Cook off all the alcohol, then cover and cook again for another five to ten minutes, or until tender. Add chives at the end.

In addition to these dishes, I ended up making a pseudo-dessert, which started out as a meal for Nealon until I made too much. Basically, it's a mashed yam recipe, sweetened with raisins, brown sugar and maple syrup. I incorporated half-and-half into the yams. Top it off with some whipped cream and chocolate syrup:

Easy 250MB Dropbox Upgrade

For those of you who haven't noticed, if you log into your Dropbox account on the website and click on the "Getting Started" tab, there are a few easy instructions for you to do to become a "Dropbox Guru," which will net you an additional 250MB (which is not subject to the 3GB cap for referrals (or whatever your cap was, depending on when you maxed out your referrals). Anyways, I just logged in and hit the tab, and I got a notification that my account was upgraded, without having to do anything extra. I guess just using Dropbox as often as I do is enough to satisfy the requirements. To wit, they are:

(1) Take the Dropbox tour (which I actually didn't do, so I guess that's optional).
(2) Install Dropbox on your computer.
(3) Put files in the Dropbox folder.
(4) Install Dropbox on other computers you use.
(5) Share a folder with friends and colleagues.
(6) Invite some friends to join Dropbox.

I did steps 2-6, so that was enough to give me the bonus. I'm sure the only person who cares about this is Jon, since he's the other person I know who geeked out over this last time I posted.

Reading a NYT article on a coal plant's attempt at carbon sequestration. . .

and paused at this quote:

“It doesn’t matter to me if a scientist says it may or may not leak,” said Elisa Young, an anti-coal activist who lives nearby on the Ohio side of the river. “That’s not going to stop it from leaking when push comes to shove.” (emphasis mine)

I know what she's trying to say, but it still strikes me because the skepticism is so intense that I could easily see an equivalent situation where a hard-line conservative would have the same animosity toward a particular "liberal" issue.

Full disclosure: I am in favor of a large and diverse energy portfolio to drastically reduce our carbon output in the next few decades. We've dragged our feet so long on this issue that I'm not sure if we can even afford to have the same skittishness on issues such as nuclear or CCS. That is not to say that we should ignore the very real issues that nuclear and CCS raise, such as storage and disposal for the former and direct and indirect effects of carbon acidification.

Honestly, though, I am just so happy that we're finally on the cusp of some very real measures to reduce our impact on climate, even if we have to wade through a lot of political BS and anti-intellectual arguments by lay people who believe they have caught some detail debunking global warming, despite the fact that thousands upon thousands of scientists have researched this for decades. It has been insulting to say the least, having studied climate science and knowing full well about peer-reviewed science and the politicization of climate change. It's why I went to law school and what I hope to work on after I have officially passed the bar.

Upgraded my Clear account, totally worth it.

So, I totally just upgraded my Clear account after Rachel's persistent complaining about speed on her Mac. I was averaging about 1.6-2 Mbps on my 3 Mbps plan, but now I upgraded my service to an uncapped plan. "Clear" change in speed: (ROFLcopter)

I am so bad... and in love.

I almost thought I was watching SNL last night. . .

when I saw Wolf Blitzer on Celebrity Jeopardy with Alex Trebek. To think that there was even a grain of truth to the whole Sean Connery Celebrity Jeopardy skits that SNL used to do with Will Ferrell. Just watch:

I mean... Trebek had to loan him some money to participate in Final Jeopardy, cause he had -$4,100!!! C'mon man! You're on CNN. At least PRETEND like you're a relatively intelligent human being.

In other news, props to Andy Richter, who I really like as a comedian and apparently now as a Jeopardy juggernaut. (although the questions were admittedly easy)

Late Night Updates in the House of Ling

I'm in the middle of working on some volunteer research, learning about the scope of Measure 66 in Oregon, and realized that I should probably do a quick little update on life in the House of Ling:

• Nealon has had his first haircut, courtesy of me.
• Nealon now likes to mimic my phone calls by babbling on the phone.
• I have no job (not really an update).
• I bought some video games/computer games and pre-ordered Windows 7 (on the cheap).
• I am now a member of the ECA, the Entertainment Consumers Association for one-year, for free.
• I have renewed my membership with the MIT Coop for ten years, for $10.

Like most of my friends, I'm still waiting on bar results, so I can't really say how marketable I am right now as a J.D. with no license. Hopefully that situation will change next week, but until then, I have to keep myself busy on the daddy and research volunteer fronts.

Seriously?

Reading this article in the NYT about how banks make a killing each ear from overdraft fees, especially by prioritizing charges in a way to maximize the number of overdrafts one can have in a single day. It's pretty obvious that the banks are against new regs to either opt-in for overdraft protection (rather than forcing us to opt-out) or to notify the consumer prior to a potential overdraft so that he or she may decide. However, I thought that this excuse was just laughable:

“If you think about when you swipe your card at, let’s say, Starbucks or at the Safeway or the Giant, there is no real sort of interaction there,” said Mr. Talbott. “It’s just approved or disapproved. So how logically would that work? Would a screen come up? Would someone at the bank call the checkout clerk and say, ‘That customer is overdrawn?’ Logistically that would be very difficult to implement.” (emphasis mine)

I mean, are you SERIOUS? When I'm at the Freddy's, I go through about 3-4 confirmation screens to use my debit card. I'm sure it is not THAT logistically difficult to add an additional prompt, especially since the card sliders are hooked up to a phone network (and thus possibly to the internet, so that the machine could get a firmware update from its maker). I mean, I may be assuming a lot of things about this technology, but that quote just drums up an image of a lazy, corpulent banker complaining about getting up as he struggles through another mouthful of mashed potatoes and roast. Seriously, just read this.

Blind Man's Bluff: McCafe Latte v. Starbucks Latte

Today, Rachel and I, in a preview of our upcoming blind taste-testing party, decided to compare lattes served at McDonalds v. Starbucks. After talking about how a ConsumerReports.org article claimed that McDonald's coffee tastes better than Starbucks, we decided to see if the same results would hold true for lattes. Here's the Tale of the Tape for these two competitors:

	McDonald's	Starbucks'
Size	12 oz. (TIE)	12 oz. (TIE)
Price	$2.29 (WIN)	$2.50 (LOSE)
Barista	Overweight, unattractive male (LOSE)	Skinny, passably attractive female (WIN)

Now, from just the stats, you can see that we're kind of running at a tie, with each coffee holding a stats record of 1-1-1. However, in regard to taste, we both found that Starbucks' clearly delivered a knockout punch to McDonald's because of it smoother, more milky taste. There was an almost burnt taste coming from McDonald's, by contrast. Now you know, and knowing is half the battle.

G.I. JOE!

Lunch Menu Today: Steak and Salad

Thanks to the Reduced Value section in my Fred Meyer, I was able to buy some steak that was originally at $9.99/lb for around $6.99/lb. Bought about .92 lbs of it (I think it might be some kind of sirloin, but I threw away the packaging) and used about 2/3 of it to make Rachel and me some steak and salad. Really just a simple thing to do:

Season the steak w/ salt, pepper, chili powder, paprika, sear on both sides at medium high for 1.5 minutes, then cook at medium low for another minute on each side in order to get a nice medium-cooked steak. Let it cool and collect its juices, then slice against the grain.

To make a gravy, de-glaze the pan with some red wine (I had some leftover pinot noir), add some water, mixed cornstarch + water, salt, pepper, a few drops of lime juice, Worchestershire sauce, and some mushrooms. Drizzle on steak and top it off with some sliced chives.

Everyone knows how to make a salad, so just go with whatever. The final product (in picture form, for once!):

As an added bonus, here's a picture of Nealon:

So I am sitting outside Village Preschool next to the law campus with Nealon asleep, and I am looking at a mural of a white lioness with angel wings. Weird...

Baby Swap

It is 5:29 am and I swapped baby care with Rachel about 30 minutes ago. Why am I still up? (Answer: Because I am stupid) On another note, I have committed myself (well, not really, since I am dual-booting) to using Jolicloud as my Ubuntu flavor, but may have deleted some important backup files in the midst of creating the necessary extended partition for my install (why does ASUS insist on two primary partitions and two hidden primary partitions? Isn't there a simpler way to do this?) Oh well, it doesn't matter that much to me, since I try to back up my files religiously (at least the important ones).

For some reason, I am attracted to parentheses today.

I don't think I can handle being poor and unemployed very well. It's getting to the point where I am getting insane over our dwindling finances. Give me a job!

The level of civil discourse in America is amazing. . .

in its sheer stupidity. Ignoring any constitutional arguments as to whether this is a less-protected form of speech (as an incitement to riot or true threat) or protected under the First Amendment, are people really so outraged at the idea of Obama as president that they wave signs that call for his death, as well as the death of his family? I mean, this plus the guy with the gun strapped to his leg and the guy with the knife and the unregistered gun in his car and the guy who went all psycho on a black woman's Rosa Parks poster amid cheers followed by news reporting that ignored the fact she was provoked really are just more examples of how stupid, ignorant, and racist people in this country can be.

(I am curious as to whether there were similar death threats made against Clinton back when he was moving toward universal health care legislation back in the 90s. If anyone knows this off-hand, please let me know in the comments.)

Why does everything in the political area have to be reduced to arguments over who is Hitler and which political party is closest to Nazism or Fascism? Can't we take an intelligent look at the mechanics of the health care bill, rather than spreading stupid misinformation and lies over the concept of universal health care, government death panels, and the like?

The Return of the Chef: Peppered Buffalo Steak With Salad

No pictures today since I can't find my camera, but I'll share what I made for dinner nonetheless (serves two-three). Since I eyeball most of my cooking, I'll only have some numbers :

Greek-ish Salad

Romaine lettuce

Olive and feta mix (from olive bar)

2 slices of yellow onion, halved

6 cherry tomatoes, whole

Salt

Red wine vinegar

Just mix all of the ingredients together. . . I really don't know how else to elaborate here.

Peppered Buffalo Steak

Buffalo steak (0.57 oz)

Salt and pepper

Garlic powder

Paprika

Gravy (see below)

Lemon thyme, fresh and chopped

Season the buffalo steak and coat both sides liberally with black pepper. Turn on the pan to med-high heat, sear on both sides for 3 minutes. Cook an additional 3 minutes on either side at med, med-low heat for well-done (I was reading some online directions, thinking that buffalo would cook differently than beef, and didn't read carefully enough. Still it came out alright). Let the meat rest for 10 minutes, then slice into thin slices at an angle. Spoon gravy, garnish with fresh lemon thyme

Gravy

Drippings from peppered buffalo steak

1 Tbsp. butter

Water

Cornstarch

Tabasco sauce

Salt

Lemon thyme, fresh and chopped

Deglaze the pan used to cook the steak with some water (or wine, if you have it). Melt butter into the drippings. Mix cornstarch with a little bit of water in a separate bowl, then add to the pan. Add salt and Tabasco to taste (the vinegar should be noticeable). Chop some lemon thyme and add to gravy at the last minute. Spoon onto steak.

It was delicious, of course. Rachel gives it an 8.75 on a scale of 1 (absolutely terrible) to 10 (culinary orgasm). I guess I can always improve. Now we're just savoring the lingering taste of pepper with a 2002 pinot noir from Wetherell Vineyards.

A much better article that I could write on Google Voice:

Here

See why Rob, Tim, and I love it so. Free phone calls!

Dinner Success

Tonight, I spent two hours slaving away at the kitchen and made the family some tomato and cream pappardelle, garlic bread and, the piece de resistance, bread pudding, all made from scratch (minus the pasta, since I am holding off on it until I get a bit more money). I must say that I'm proud to have made bread pudding, which required several skills--tempering and double boiling--that a roasting guy like me doesn't usually make. I was so proud that I took some pictures (though oddly none of the other dishes, though they similarly came out well).

Partitions and me. . .

We just don't understand each other, mostly because I didn't realize there was a 4 primary partition limit on Linux, because I'm a huge n00b. Getting back into the groove of using computers can be scary sometimes.

Edit: For now, I think I will USB boot Jolicloud to make sure I don't destroy my computer accidentally.

New computer in. . .

Oh this ASUS Eee PC 1005HA is so sweet. I am busy configuring an umer of things on this right now.

Life is starting to get back in gear. . .

I think I may have started to get the hang of enjoying myself again. Rachel's taking the week off, so maybe we'll have some time to actually function as a normal family for once, now that the bar is over.

Sometimes there is nothing to do in the middle of the night.

I hate my life after the bar. . .

I feel empty without all that bullshit studying to do. I can't seem to enjoy things anymore. Law was a bad decision in retrospect. Maybe I can still pursue my dream of illustrating very obscure jokes.

Last day of the bar. . .

Yesterday was the worst part of the bar exam, yet I don't think I screwed it up too badly, which means that all I have left is the MBE, which I've been performing well enough on that I'm sure that it'll make up for any deficiencies I may have in the essays (hopefully none). My body feels like I've been steamrolled and my mind is a little foggy. . . but I'm going to do it.

But all I can think of now is who the hell eats $180 worth of eggs? Because that's how many I bought in my dream last night.

For those taking the bar (and those who are not). . .

Distract yourself for a few minutes by thinking about this test:

http://www.philosophersnet.com/games/identity.htm

I'll tell you mine if you'll tell me yours in the comments.

Edit: I have posted my answers in the comments, so don't look at the comments until you've done the test!

Edit 2: The thread link where I got this test.

Edit 3: For those of you with trouble, I was able to copy and paste the relevant text, but I did not select all, I only selected up until before the "Recommended Reading" section.

Edit 4: For those of you STILL with trouble, just email your answer to me and I will paste it in with just your first name, or anonymously if you are somehow worried about the internets.

List of thing BARBRI professors were wrong about:

This is a list of things I got wrong in some essays because the answer clearly contradict what the BARBRI professor said in lecture (just a running list, will update). Feel free to add to this list:

(1) You cannot file a motion for summary judgment in Oregon until the night before trial. Summary judgment motions must be filed 45 days before trial.

(2) Apparently if you have a sales contract with the offer at $6 for services, and the buyer accepts but says $5, it's not a different term subject to the knock-out rule but is an additional term.

Look. . . I don't need this stress.

Listening to Prof. Kanter on OPB. . .

Talking about the faith healing verdict in Oregon (sorry I couldn't find a local link) and the constitutional issues of having a specific criminal statute excluding faith healing as a defense to criminal liability for child neglect. Regardless of our feelings over the parents and faith healing, there are some specific First Amendment issues that he raises. Additionally, I think that he makes a good point in reminding us to all remember that criminal law deals with mens rea--as opposed to just negligence in a civil case--for those people who may be upset over the verdict.

Of course, this doesn't mean that I necessarily agree with the verdict. . . but the constitutional issues are very important to consider from a broader perspective. Also, I won't say anything about religion, since I didn't add the tag. I don't have the time or the patience to discuss religion in the careful manner that it needs.

Just got signed up to the Google Voice Beta.

Can't wait to fool around with it when the bar is over next week! I am going to dig:

(1) the voicemail-to-text transcription (even though it's not totally accurate just yet);
(2) different voicemails for different persons;
(3) a new phone number (a virtual work cell phone number, without the cost!);
(4) free U.S. VoIP (I think. . .).

I almost went with a Cambridge, MA number because of nostalgia, but my sense got the better of me.

I can hear someone in my apartment complex playing Rock Band. . .

And it sounds like they're playing drums on easy to "Living on a Prayer. . ."

wow.

Ebony's 1985 prediction of what MJ would look like in 2000

So close!!

http://twitpic.com/ams6l

Is it too soon?

Edit: Read the caption at the bottom of the picture!

Dear BARBRI

When you have a torts question about a pilot and negligence, please remember to use "operation" and not "maintenance" when you are talking about whether he reasonably landed his plane on the ground. When I think of "maintenance," I am thinking about TOOLS. . . TOOLS LIKE BARBRI.

God, a week and a half left. . .

Since one article about race wasn't enough. . .

I thought I'd at least link to this as an example of more Godwin's Law-action regarding race for the purpose of blatant sensationalism. I think articles like this take away from the serious problems that do exist today with institutionalized prejudice in all forms, whether race, alienage, descent, culture, gender, or sexual orientation (I think I got most of the suspect classes here, so my bar preparation seems to going pretty well). This isn't a damn race (pun unintended) for people to out discrimination, and there isn't some sort of scoreboard that's chalking up points for how sensitive you appear to be by crying wolf. This does a disservice to all those people who spend hours of their day experiencing real discrimination first-hand.

Take some time to place things in context and learn how to use your brain. That's really what I want to just shout at these people.

Couching the Gay Pride Movement in Terms of the Civil Rights Movement: Appropriate?

An interesting opinion article by LZ Granderson, a gay, black ESPN commentator, based on his experiences being both gay and black. He implies there is a lack of relativism in comparing the LGBT movement's criticisms of President Obama's lack of decisive action on policies like DADT and repealing DOMA. What's probably most striking is that he likens LGBT comparisons to the civil rights movement in the 1960s to another example of white appropriation of the African-American experience, especially in regards to criticisms of DADT, a relatively recent policy compared to our sordid history of racism.

This is not to say that gay rights are not as important as minority rights, as Granderson expressly makes clear. However, do we do a disservice to hundreds of years of race-based dicrimination by what he implies is a civil rights version of Godwin's Law, or are we instead taking proactive steps to prevent a potential longer-term acceptance of sexual-orientation based discrimination through invocation of the civil rights movement? Do we hold President Obama to a higher standard on LGBT rights because he has adopted a heritage of American relations between blacks and whites--from slavery to more covert institutions of racism today--by virtue of the color of his skin? Should this give him special insight into the ramifications of failing to act decisively, rather than incrementally (if the LGBT community concedes that much)?

One other thing Granderson notes is that being LGBT doesn't similarly give insight into race-based discrimination, anecdotally speaking of the segregation of white and black gays on different floors in a bar in Washington D.C., and the rage-filled flinging of the n-word to blacks in California after Proposition 8 passed because of their disproportional votes in favor of of the measure. Of course, individuals are individuals, with their own particular prejudices, but it is examples like these that really highlight his major premise: invocation and adoption of historical emblems like the civil rights movement should be done with proper consideration and respect of the context and history behind and leading up to those events. Just look at how laughable and incredulous the Republicans are in calling Judge Sonia Sotomayor a racist (although I myself may have now invoked some parallel to Godwin's Law in pointing this out).

Don't get your hair cut with a hoodie on. . .

I had some loose hair strands on my neck. I mean, it's HEAD HAIR, but still gross.

Don't waste my time. . .

Hey, to the person who got 199/200 on the MBE Practice Exam: Die. You waste your money and ours by cheating and screwing up the statistics that people like me rely on to determine our progress. Do you think I like to pay $2800 and get flawed feedback when I have a child and family to worry about? Are you worried that someone is going to look at how you're actually performing and laugh in the basement of the BARBRI offices at how stupid you are, or are you some kind of a grade whore who has to cheat in order to maintain his sense of superiority, but makes sure he has one wrong on his answer sheet so it doesn't look REALLY OBVIOUS that he cheated?

Either way, you are an idiot, because you can't fathom the level of statistical improbability that you would have to ignore for this to occur. You suck.

The Right to Bear NuMchucks?!

Yes... Senator Orrin Hatch somehow trying to tie a case about banning nunchaku in New York to a plot by Judge Sotomayor to destroy our Second Amendment rights. He's clearly in the pocket of the Big Numchuck lobby. Or maybe that's Big Ninja Turtles. . .

Yay for rational basis review!

Edit: Rob didn't get it. Don't quit my day job I guess. . . wait, I'm unemployed!

Topics to Cover (Just a note to self)

Property
Evidence (done)
Contracts/Sales
Constitutional Law (done)
Torts (done)
Criminal Law/Procedure (done)

Wills/Trusts
Civil Procedure
Administrative Law (done)
Business Entities (done)
Secured Transactions (done)
Fed Income Tax
Ethics

Gmail is down, but not other services. . .

Like Blogger! Or Google Reader for that matter. Well, if Rachel or Rob happen to be looking at blogs today, I will just post my email here in outline form:

(1) We want to plan a Korean BBQ dinner w/ Rob Le and Rachel's mom in the next week, if possible.

(2) There is a Hawaiian style grill called Hapa Grill that has been getting good reviews from locals (from Hawaii) and is on the cheaper side of restaurants in PDX catering to transplants (which is hella expensive, trust me). This is an open invite to friends on a future, undetermined trip.

Edit: Oh, and they have some kind of gallery to showcase their menu.

Edit 2: So it turns out it's just not working on Firefox. . . weird.

I did a regression analysis of the MBE exam yesterday. . .

I am like a lame version of Nate Silver. If anyone wants the Excel sheet (which will require you determine how many wrong you have in each subject area in the morning and evening separately), I can send it to you. It did help me out in finding some weak trends in my own work.

Of course, I'd have to really take the time to go into sub-topic analysis. Which I won't.

1 month, 3 computers down.

All bought at different times by me. I am starting to think that I am a walking EMP pulse, but only for things that I own. WTF.

Please tell me this isn't some kind of sign.

Why computer failures totally screw me over. . .

I missed an opportunity to make $200 with little to no work. That's what four hours without a computer will do to you. Sucktastic.

Even I post about adorable kids. . .

Who sing the Megaman 2 and 3 theme songs in a cute Asian way:

Best Prof Ever, Dave?

The sheer awesomeness of my Environmental Liability Insurance Seminar and A paper prof, Dave, is impetus for a variation of "Best Friend Ever" (since I would never presume friendship without his permission, because he is so awesome): the "Best Prof Ever." He's always been very good with feedback and is always available for questions, but what puts the icing on the cake is his very good taste in (1) nerd games and (2) eateries. The latest example of the latter?

He's taking me for a late lunch at BUNK. Now, I know a lot of you already are "down low" with how awesome this place is (not me, apparently), but did you know that Tommy Habetz was a sous-chef at Po, at which Mario Batali was chef-partner?

I didn't think so. . . and Dave tells me that Tommy definitely has the MB's influence in his foods, so I'm psyched. It's as close to the horse's mouth you can get in PDX.

Study Session Reggie

Really an old post, but here is a homemade Reggie that Todd and I made a few days ago.

This is a fried egg, fried chicken, pepper bacon reggie made with wheat french toast. Coma-inducing!

Property. . .OH MY GOD.

The video is nice. . . but having to hear three days of that sharp, whistling hiss is going to really test the limits of my sanity.

Also, was I the only one laughing when she said intestacy and I was thinking "without testes"?

Shin Megami Tensei: Devil Survivor

Okay, so I haven't really had the opportunity to indulge my impulse to buy video games in a while, so you can understand why I'm reduced to a giggling virgin when I see a game like Shin Megami Tensei: Devil Survivor. Really, I love those Japanese turn-based tactical RPGs and I especially am hooked on the whole devil-summoning kitsch that Atlus goes through in developing successor titles to this series. It's times like these that I miss having a PS2 and a life outside of the law.

This latest iteration of the series combines both the demon fusion aspects of the SMT series with a strategy RPG for battles. However, when you choose to attack a particular enemy, you go into a first person view, turn-based RPG system, combining both a Dragon Quest/Final Fantasy type system with a Tactics Ogre kind of deal. Of course, I haven't played this game and probably won't until several months after this post, so I can only speculate how it actually plays, but Gamespot gave it a 9.0 out of 10. . . so it has to be good, right?



Also, it's got sweet metal!

Waiting for 3 more essays. . .

This morning we did the MPT, which I was able to actually finish for once, followed by three essays. We'll do three more in about 20 minutes, and then be done for the day at 3:30-ish. I hate to say that I am not looking forward to taking the bar.

I'm just wasting my time now playing with my multi-tool. IT'S ERGONOMIC AHHHHHHHH! Maybe I'll be forced to go all MacGuyver on something.

Bought a mini-tool today

While at Frys getting a replacement AC adapter and cables for the TV, I saw a cute little number with a wirecutter/vice, blade, serrated blade, can opener/flathead, bottle opener/flathead/wire stripper, flathead, Phillips head, awl, file. . .

AND AN LED LIGHT!

Nerdgasm for only $9.99. This will be useful when I get lost at night.

Best Friend Ever? David

I've decided to just make a tag for best friend ever. Here's what David had to say about my bar exam prep:

David: right
David: but im sure you'll do well
David: if not
David: then we arent friends anymore, so i hope that gives u added motivation

Awesome.

Secured Transactions - Warning Signs

We are about 25 minutes into the lecture, and we haven't moved past page one. The introductory page. With no blanks, no questions.

This is why this class goes for three hours instead of its scheduled two-and-a-half. Bite me. Also, if I had the gift of seeing legal fictions, I would shoot myself.

Please Give Me A Job. . .

So's I can buy me an Always Innovating Touchbook. . .it's finally out and spec'ed:

• Texas Instruments OMAP3530 with Micron 256MB (RAM) + 256MB (NAND) Memory
• 8.9 inches 1024x600 A+ screen
• Main storage: 8GB SD card — we decided to change from Micro SD to standard SD, so that you can easily upgrade it
• Internal USB wifi 802.11 b/g/n powered by a Ralink 3070 chipset
• Internal USB bluetooth class 2.1
• FCC, CE, UL-certified, 5V, 3.5A power adapter
• 8.9 inches pressure sensitive touch screen
• US Qwerty 24cm-large keyboard — around 95% of the size of a standard keyboard
• Cirque Touchpad
• Two Owolff high-quality internal stereo speakers
• 3D accelerometer
• Two internal batteries 6000 and 12000mAh — it can be replaced with a screw driver
• 7 USB ports: three external, four internal, three of them may be reserved for wifi, bluetooth and keyboard
• Bi-color silver/black case — see photos — with a beautiful dark-red back cover (we decided to go only for red for the first batch as it really jumps out, you won't regret it).
• Secured attachment system of tablet into keyboard
• Independent magnet system for the tablet — we don't want your Touch Book to un-magnetize all your credit cards while carrying it in your bag!

Always Innovating

Words you don't want to hear in a doctor's office. . .

"More intimate" plastic surgery. . .

GROSS

I might have just had bad string cheese. . .

The flavor was not nice, and I had to wash it down without chewing it. I really hope I am not going to experience some horrible throw-up episode in BARBRI.

Gross. . .

Also, I am sad that I missed the phone call for poutine.

The Common Law Material Breach Rule

Or, as Prof. Epstein likes to say, the "really bad wrong" rule.

Shaft. . . shaft. . . shaft.

Thank god this is a video lecture. My mind is in the gutter whenever he says this stuff.

Buzz Aldrin: From Earth to the Moon to Hip Hop History

Making of Buzz Aldrin's Rocket Experience w/ Snoop Dogg and Talib Kweli from Buzz Aldrin

Why does Buzz Aldrin look like Hugh Hefner?!

Edit: I love Talib Kweli.

Parol Sex

In Contracts today, learning about how people in me-DI-E-val England had parol sex, as opposed to oral sex.

(it's a contracts joke about oral evidence)

Tom Richmond, Best Friend Ever?

He has agreed to help me with my computer woes with his Mac expertise. I love it!

6-8 Weeks. . .

. . . is how long I am having to wait for my computer to get fixed. BIOS won't load up, but the HD is spinning. I'm still under manufacturer's warranty, but the ironic part is that had I been outside of warranty, Frys would have taken a look at it first, and this may have been over in a week with an extra $65. Of course, I guess this is how bureaucracy (and Acer) seem to go.

This also means that I'm probably going to have to spend about $70-100 for a replacement AC adapter for my other computer to take the bar, since ExamSoft doesn't work with Macs. My life is hilarious right now. If anyone has any cheaper options for me (like the ability to borrow a PC for the next 5-6 weeks), I would appreciate it. Otherwise, I am just going to sit here and cry over how much fake money I am spending on the bar.

Don't go to law school.

Also, this Contracts guy is equal parts hilarious and boring. How the hell do you manage to pull that off?!

Weekends make me hate my life. . .

If I study, I hate the bar exam and BARBRI. If I don't study, I hate the fact that I'm behind in my studying. Today also happens to be a typical Portland day, so I really am hating life right now. Thank god for punk rawk and Pandora, otherwise I would just beat my head against the wall right now.

Well, let's not rule that out just yet.

Studying Crim Law. . .

Finally marked all my emails as "read"

Time to start over on a new slate in Gmail. Of course, it doesn't mean I DELETED THEM, but that's okay, since I'm only using 22% of my inbox.

1.6 gigs of mail. . . that's just horrible.

Why I am waiting for Google Voice:

http://www.google.com/support/voice/bin/answer.py?answer=115073&cbid=18y4rw2i0wcnc&src=cb&lev=answer

Listening to voice mails and recording phone calls on the fly seem to be pretty hawt. At the same time, that raises some privacy concerns. . .

Scribblenauts... I want this game so bad.

Read about this on the SA forums, and am totally interested in games that involve using Einstein, blowtorches, or other things in the dictionary to fight other things and get stars.

Criminal Law

Man, this guy makes criminal law seem really awesome. . . I'm sure that the reality of this is much different. He just did an impression of Barney from The Simpsons. Rule for today:

Addicts and alcoholics are always voluntary intoxicated!

Testing out Blogging via Email. . .

I'm trying to figure out why this is useful, since if I'm on the internet and have access to my Gmail account, I likely have access to Blogger.

LOL, the professor just said not to use text language for essays.  It will equal failure.

Testing out Mobile Blogging

So, I'm testing out my phone's ability to post to my blog... I am a tech dinosaur.

Bought a new book today during BARBRI

The Future of Work, by Thomas Malone, Prof. at the Sloan School of Management, MIT.

http://ccs.mit.edu/futureofwork/

I need to unsubscribe to my MIT Alumni Association RSS feed. . .

A quote from the website:

In The Future of Work, renowned organizational theorist Thomas W. Malone, codirector of MIT’s landmark initiative “Inventing the Organizations of the 21st Century,” shows where these things are already happening today and how—if we choose—they can happen much more in the future. Malone argues that a convergence of technological and economic factors—particularly the rapidly falling cost of communication—is enabling a change in business organizations as profound as the shift to democracy in governments. For the first time in history, says Malone, it will be possible to have the best of both worlds—the economic and scale efficiencies of large organizations, and the human benefits of small ones: freedom, motivation, and flexibility.

I was able to buy this used for $0.75 + $3.95 shipping. Hopefully it'll be a good read. There's also a preview of it on Google Book search.

Opera Unite: The solution to all my internet-related needs?

File server, media server, web server, SERVER SERVER SERVER?!!

Opera Unite is apparently an effort to combine a bunch of web-related services under one application so that you don't have to sign up for a bunch of separate services. I haven't had the time to fool around with it yet, but I'll post updates to the awesomeness.

Link to Opera Unite: http://unite.opera.com/

The perfect example of why we need antitrust laws.

BARBRI is flaky in the quality of its lecturers. There is no feasible alternative available, as it has cornered the market. The next-closest competition is PMBR, which does only Multistate multiple choice topics, and may or may not suck (my interactions with the PMBR head rep for the school have given me an impression that the latter holds true). Yet, for all its inconsistency, BARBRI still manages to fleece around $2800/student because of our fear of passing the bar. Furthermore, the general consensus is that most people need BARBRI to pass a state bar, making the program not a choice for a study aid, but a prerequisite to practice law. Just look at the numbers:

Bar Exam (OR): $525.00

BARBRI (approx): $2,800.00

BABRI costs over 5x the amount of the bar exam. Obviously, you can't hedge your bets on taking the bar five times because of the fact that there is a lost opportunity cost each time you fail the exam, and BARBRI guarantees a high level of passage (in the 90% range). But can you hedge your bets for at least one failure of the bar (I don't intend to fail, and I AM taking BARBRI, so this is purely hypothetical). Let's make a few assumptions.

First, assume that Student fails the bar exam once and must take it again. He did not take BARBRI. He works from August to the beginning of December, then stops working to study again for the bar, without using BARBRI again. Only because of these economic times, let's just assume that people who pass the bar (and obstentially have taken BARBRI) aren't finding attorney jobs and are therefore in the same working pool as you (either as clerks, non-traditional legal jobs, or non-legal jobs) being paid the same amount as you. Clerks traditionally get paid around $12-15/hr, barring outliers like the BPA, which pays $18.75-ish. Here's a rough estimate of some of the costs you lose by taking the bar exam again:

Bar Exam: $525.00 (no, you can't take it for free after failing once)

3 months of non-work (assume $15/hr): $15/hr * 40 hrs/week * 12 weeks = $7,200

Total Cost: $7725.00 versus $2,800 you spent on BARBRI.

Obviously I have no pass rate/fail rate percentages, which makes a lot of this meaningless in terms of realy cost-benefit analysis (you'd need to know the differential rate of passage between people who have taken BARBRI and not taken BARBRI, etc.). But it provides a basic level of assurance that you most likely did spend your money wisely, even though the professors suck.

Con Law, Day 2

Several people left during the second break. Immediately afterwards, he kind of did an opera singing joke. Not worth it.

My hand hurts.

Being a Constitutional Lawyer

Any delusions that I've recently had to being a Constitutional lawyer have been washed away by this guy's lecture. It's so long-winded and convoluted. . . unnecessarily so. Thank god I'm in the classroom with the video transfer, so that we can all laugh and roll our eyes without him knowing what is going on.

I've already seen some people leave, and I think Jon may go soon too. He's not writing anything! There is no rational basis for this class of law students to be punished like this.

Jon Bloomfield is a close second.

He gave me an apple slice!

Aubrey is my new best friend!

I got me some loose-leaf tea! Bomb-diggity! Trying it out tonight.

Con Law, Day 1

Our guy is a hotshot law professor from Seattle U / opera singer:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David_Skover

Post-MPT Impressions

I hope that someone else felt like this after they took one of the practice MPTs today.

Faking it!

Prof. asks if anyone has heard of a "Theory of the Case Memo." One person raised their hand. He said, "Well, that's more than I usually see," followed by "The only person who knew this was the professor who wrote the question, because it's a fake memo."

Someone's taking his "Fake it!" advice to an unprecedented level.

Anecdotal evidence guarantees MPT passage!

If an army vet who received brain damage from a bomb explosion causing him to become a slow reader only was able to read one case, write his MPT and pass, so can I?

HE FAILED IT FOUR TIMES PRIOR UNTIL THE PROF TOLD HIM TO JUST STOP PREPPING AND START WRITING!!!

Today is a caps lock kind of day.

FAKE IT

That is the advice we are being given if we don't know the law for this exam, because "that's what lawyers do."

ALL THE STEREOTYPES ARE TRUE!

:(

Goat Answers

We're going over the Multistate Performance Test, which is basically a huge closed universe essay. The guy is hilarious, but I thought this was the best (paraphrased):

"What they're looking for is sheep answers. You can write a goat answer. . . that's cool, that's cool. Be a goat. But do you want to be so different that a grader is going to get alert and think, 'Huh, this is different. . . maybe I should read this EXTRA carefully because it's so different'?"

"Good idea? Good idea?"

Torts, Day 1

Why is it that all torts professors:

(1) Ramble on with tort anecdotes for a long time; and

(2) Yell "OUTRAGEOUS!" when explaining IIED.

At least he can chop down each intentional tort to two factors.

Smart Mop: The Recession Buster?

I was watching Batman on broadcast TV today, and I came across this ad:

Yes... if you watch past 0:30, Anthony Sullivan is actually encouraging you to mop up your spilt soda off the floor, wring it out, and drink it. I never thought that the economy would get this bad.

Stuck on a Saturday in Room 2

All my J.D. and J.D.* peeps taking the OR bar are in BARBRI class on a Saturday, learning Civ Pro from some guy who seems like he needs some Ritalin. He is pretty awesome at teaching though. I did well in Civ Pro my first year, so maybe I'll do okay for our assignment due Monday.

Stupid assignments. Didn't I graduate from law school?!

Also, I have to think about designs for our team shirts for kickball. We're the "Hot Cops." Now I have to watch Season 1 of Arrested Development all over again.

Catch up on BARBRI

Instead of doing BARBRI, I did this last night:

Congratulations to Rachel's sister, Iris, and Rick on their nuptials. (This will be used as some kind of seal for envelopes holding wedding gifts to those attending. Which is not me.) Also, congratulations for me for learning how easy it is to convert a line drawing raster to vector. I am really making a mistake by being a lawyer, lol. Time for a power weekend without Rachel and Nealon!

BARBRI at home today

Two factors I considered:

(1) The BARBRI lady currently lecturing sucks.

(2) I had to install Nealon's car seat in the nanny's car, which took much longer than I expected. (I already get to BARBRI late without having to deal with that)

Now I'm just listening to lectures on Rob's big screen. Taiiiight.

Dear BARBRI lady:

You are not allowed to chastise us and snarkily tell us that you're speaking incomprehensibly fast to get us out in time, will not guarantee that we get out in time if we ask you to slow down, and then spend 20 minutes to give us a stupid pep talk about bar exam statistics, which will now make us 20 minutes late in getting out.

BARBRI. . .know your enemies.

If the people who are teaching BARBRI thus far are representative of the type of person I may become as a lawyer, I am seriously afraid of passing the bar. This lady I'm listening to sounds like she's on crack and she uses all these buzz words like "know your enemies" and "hit the target." I think she also said not to "Charlie out" (I think?) which she says is picking Bs and Cs on the multiple choice for long stretches. Also, you can tell that she is not thinking when she is talking and is just streaming all the words out of her mouth as she thinks of them.

I am definitely not pumped.

Nope.

Edit: She just said, "Come on guys, this isn't a social workers' exam. You guys are trying to be lawyers. You're not hippies."

Obviously, she doesn't realize that she is teaching at the equivalent of a hippie law school. Everyone laughed. I felt awkward, lol.

Edit 2: As a point of comparison, here are a few choice gems (almost verbatim) from my Business Associations 1 professor, who also was similarly oblivious to her audience:

"Where are my bleeding heart liberals at?" (she's a firm believer of the Chicago school of law)

"Who has family members with drug or substance problems?" (trying to relate a case to our lives, apparently).

Edit 3: "Keep your stamina, keep your focus."

This is the pen tablet device I've been looking for. . .

http://www.slashgear.com/hantech-siso-tablo-review-finally-2644675/

You can mount it on any laptop up to a screen size 15.4 inches, use it with a piece of paper and a pen, rather than the standard pen they give you, and pay only $99, which is the same price I paid for my Wacom tablets a few years back. Just add this to my wish list when I get a job.

PS: Thanks to Eva for her graduation gifts. I finished them both immediately, and will now be waiting for my Amazon.com purchase of Predictably Irrational which is expected to come to my door tomorrow.

Bad First Impression of Portland?

Yesterday morning, my dad remarked to my brother as they were flying in that he could see why I liked living in Portland.  Then, when they were waiting for their rent-a-car, my dad and brother observed the following exchange between the counter person (Counter) and another person (Person), both white males:

Person:  No ticky?  No ticky?

Counter:  No ticky, no washy!

*facepalm*  

Thank god my dad took it well (he gave a small laugh when telling me this story).  He usually has a tendency not to let stupid BS like that go.  Rachel didn't understand the reference, which I see as a fortunate sign of the times we live in, but this SF Gate article sums it up:

http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/2002/07/04/DD125975.DTL

I really think I'm lucky that I've mostly avoided being the party in stories like that.  Maybe its a lame superpower of mine?

The Family's in Portland

So, it's been a while since a post, but with all the finals hectic over and a few days of relative ease under my belt, I figure it's time to start up once again.  Graduation, as many of you know, is this Saturday, and so my family is in town today.  Unfortunately, Rachel and I overslept due to a combination of (1) late cleaning and (2) late Nealon crankiness.  Nealon and I are just hanging out right now as Rachel is doing some last-minute errands before my dad and brother get to the house.  Now I just need to figure out how to entertain them while they're here. I'm really bad at that sort of thing. . .

Jon loves Dropbox, so we both get 250MB extra.

As I mentioned before, I have a referral link to Dropbox, an awesome service that allows you to automatically upload files (and changes to files) to an online server, as well as any computers that you install a program onto.  In addition, you can collaborate files between users.  Rachel and I share files between our two accounts for home-related files.

You get 2GB for free, and every referral you get gives you an additional 250MB.  In addition, if you signed up through a referral link (like mine), you start out with an extra 250MB as well.  These referrals can cap your free storage to 5GB permanently.

It's really awesome.  Jon just signed up, and I quickly got a notice saying that my space has increasd to 2.25 GB.  He loves it.  Maybe it's because he's a tech nerd, but let me break it down for you:  No effort on your part to back up your important files on a server, AND any extra computers you may have.

Do it, do it, do it!  Referral link:  Dropbox

So you're telling me they're getting paychecks. . . AND THEY'RE GOING BACK TO THE APPLICANT POOL?

So Rob sent me this link:  http://abovethelaw.com/2009/05/stroock_offers_75000_in_stay_a.php

For those of you too lazy to read, it's another story of how another firm that gave offers to hotshot 3Ls are buying out their offers cause they can't afford new associates.  Now this isn't some chump change, but $75,000, half this year, half the next.

At first, I thought it was a nice gesture by a law firm to try to cover its ass while not entirely dumping on the fresh graduates it bagged.  Then I realized that these guys are coming back into MY applicant pool, WITH a financial cushion, while I'm stuck here with no real income, a bucketful of loans, and no top 1%, 5%, 15%, 20% or 25% to my CV.

To illustrate how utterly screwed us regular folk our, let's examine how 3Ls get jobs.  Obviously, the graduates in the T14 will not have to worry about getting jobs in fall on campus interviews at hot firms.  In a school like LC, which is in the bottom quartile of the Top 100, we probably get the top 5% hired (ignoring connections, nepotism, contracts with the devil, etc.) through this process.  I mean, I know really smart dudes hovering around the top 15% who have no job secured, so they're basically in the same boat as me when the rest of the firms and other places that need attorneys finally lock down how many associates they'll need in the spring.  So here's the factors I have to face when trying to shoot for a public interest or government job:

(1) Top school (don't got that)

(2) Top 1-30% (don't got that)

(3) Top Environmental nerds (don't got that, except for one year in NEDC)

(4) Law Review (don't got that)

(5) Public Interest experience (don't got that)

(6) Government experience (got that)

(7) Connections (barely got anything related to that)

(8) Community service (got that)

(9) Leadership (got that)

(10) Sex appeal/charisma/nice teeth/"it" factor (we don't even have to go there)

Now, this isn't an exact list, but the major point I want to make is that schools matter, and grades matter.  The rest of us mere mortals rely on the guys who hit home-runs on the top two of my list to get quickly scooped up so that we don't have to deal with them in the spring.  Now because of the economy, we get screwed in two ways.  Overqualified attorneys are now taking up our applicant pool space, as well as the cream of the crop (who also have money).  This means that I am going to be screwed for the next 2 years of applications.  Maybe by then I'll have hit a high enough GRE to go back to school.

Nealon Watch, Day 3 (much better!)

I'm feeding him some veggie pasta, and he is rocking the water right now.  I think he's gonna be alright.  And he just laid out a big man-belch.

I love my son.

Nealon Watch, Day 2

Although Nealon's diaper problems have subsided, they have been replaced by two instances of vomiting, which raises some real concerns over dehydration.  We are on a breast feeding regimen now, courtesy of the nurse's hotline.  Hopefully we can get him better soon.  The nurse also suggested buying some Pedialyte, which I guess is like baby Gatorade on steroids.

However, for those of you who want to find a silver lining in all of this, he did manage to take off my glasses before vomiting directly into my open eyes.  There's still some stinging.

Nealon's doing better, but we're still waiting. . .

We checked Nealon's diaper twice today, and it seems like he is doing better.  Still waiting on the lab sample, but I also called up the pediatrician, who is out today but will call back to reassure us, hopefully.

Here in the emergency room. . .

Rachel and I are down at Legacy Emanuel off the 289 exit on I-5. Nealon is having some physical issues as a result of diarrhea (I won't go into detail). Anyways, we are waiting for a doc and hearing some huge drama across our curtain. I hope we can get Nealon treated soon. . .

When I get a job, these are the first books I will probably buy:

Predictably/Irrational by Dan Ariely (awesome website with irrationality tests!)

I Love Yous Are For White People by Lac Su

More as I think about it. . .

What's better than studying for Securities Regulations?

Watching the video for Cutting Crew's "Died in Your Arms Tonight":

And, of course, the live performance:

Almost there...

Just turned in paper 2 of 3. I can feel this nightmare beginning to end. God, I really need some sleep right now.

Dear Widener Journal of Public Law:

When you are publishing a law review article that tries to distinguish between two forms of accounting, it is important to make sure that the labels for your illustrative tables are correct.  Otherwise, math nerds such as myself reinforce in my mind why law students don't know jack s*** about math.

By the way, the math was correct.  Kudos on that.

label:LC-mail has reached 1000+ new messages. . .

I am so going to wipe you out when I graduate.  Well, maybe not. . . BUT YOU WILL BE SUBSTANTIALLY REDUCED!

Get Dropbox, it's awesome!

I've been using Dropbox for a while now as a free way to sync my files online and onto multiple computers.  The basic way this works is that you download a program that integrates into a folder on your computer (Mac and PC) based on your user name.  Saving any file in that folder or subfolders will automatically upload it to a server when you have internet access, and will then distribute to any other computer that you've installed Dropbox on with the same account.  Thus, I can backup my files on my Acer Aspire One, online, and on my desktop at home without any extra work.  Additionally, you can share folders between users, so Rachel and I can both edit things, with the most recent version being saved onto the server.

Anyways, you start out with 2GB, but if you sign up for my referral, both of us each get an extra 250MB, and then you can start a referral chain, for a max upgrade to 5GB.  I really want to get more space on there so I can start uploading some graphic designs, so I'd appreciate if people would sign up using my referral link.  You can always delete it if you don't like it and I'll still get my boost to my storage space:

https://www.getdropbox.com/referrals/NTkzNjE3OQ

Done with one class. . . 3 more to go.

Finally finished that climate change paper.  I swear to God, if I ever go back to school again, I am not taking 3 paper-focused classes in one semester while raising a child.

Someone shoot me full of caffeine please.  Now for 3 hours of sleep.

I'm such a nerd, but technically not a Star Trek nerd. . . until now

So, today I saw a link where you can upload a photo of yourself and superimpose it on some 3D models based on the new Star Trek Movie (May 15, wooo!!).  I decided to have a little fun with it and here are the results (I previously uploaded this and realized that it would always play automatically, so here's just a link).

Edit:  Here's Nealon's version:  link

Someone needs to write a torture memo on Netflix Watch Instantly

You know, I love my $8.99 Netflix plan.  I get one physical DVD at a time, which is fine, since I will probably not be binging on movies most of the time.  If I do want to binge, however, I get unlimited Netflix Watch Instantly, which lets me watch an. . . interesting variety of movies, although I wish I could (a) get a bigger selection and (b) have an option for HD viewing, like the XBox 360.

But really, sometimes with that ease of availability, you get a little adventurous with your video decisions.  That can really lead to some bad news.  Now I'm very open to watching all sorts of movies.  I am the guy who will rent Jason X because how could people NOT find the humor in Jason Voorhees, space, and nanotechnology?  I thought xXx was kickass, and I have Snakes on a Plane on its way, shrinkwrapped, to my mailbox (thanks Westlaw Points!).  I think that aptly illustrates that I can contextually watch crappy cinema and enjoy myself.

Sometimes it comes back and bites you in the butt, though, like today, when I decided to watch You Don't Mess With the Zohan, an Adam Sandler flick.  Yes, warning signs already, but I remember really liking The Waterboy when I was in high school (I'm not really helping myself here), and since it's available INSTANTLY. . .

Suffice to say, I had to go through 117 minutes of really bad accents, gross jokes and a cameo by Mariah Carey that once again underscores why she should stick with music (I love you Mariah!).  Afterwards, I really had to ask myself, "Can it still be torture if I agree to do it?"  I mean, what if a guy said, "Sure, let's try this waterboarding thing.  I mean, I know that there are masks and straps and all that kooky stuff, but I like water, I drink it all the time.  How bad could it really be?"  Oh wait, it's already been done.

I think that's a pretty good example of how I felt after watching this movie, sans all the actual fear of death and drowning.  Please write a memo on this.

Why working in the computer lab can be fun.

So last week, a leather jacket was mysteriously left on one of the chairs in the computer lab assistants' office.  My boss and a couple of us were clueless as to who it belonged to, culminating in him sending an e-mail asking the other assistants about it and whether we should just give it to the library's Lost and Found.  We eventually find out that it belong's to Jeff when he replies to the e-mail and there is some humorous banter exchanged.

Fast forward to today.  Jeff comes in, and as usual tries to pawn off his shift to one of us (Mitch, being the go-gettingest out of the two of us in there, gets dibs).  I mention that he should take his jacket or else I'll find a huge Jonas Brothers or Hannah Montana patch to sew on the back of it and he acknowledges my threat, but leaves after a few minutes and leaves the jacket right there.

Obviously a lesson must be learned.  Unfortunately, we had no patches handy on us, so we decided on the next best thing:  to get everyone in the computer lab to take a picture wearing Jeff's jacket and then plaster it on our office computers.  The final result?

Voila.  Can't wait till he comes back to work, because I'm a big child about these things.

When writing an A paper. . .

...you need some energy.  I stopped by Market of Choice and got two non-standard energy drinks.  My thoughts:

orange FRS healthy energy

This is some "healthy energy" drink called FRS.  I got the orange flavor since I figured it would probably taste like orange juice and be the least offensive of the other flavors.  Sadly, I was wrong.  It was like drinking orange juice made from fake oranges.  Also, because it was "healthy," it did not work at giving me energy, because we all know that energy requires lots of human-synthesized chemicals being pumped into your bloodstream.

Blue Sky Cafe Energy

Next, I tried to go with a coffee drink.  You can tell that I was anticipating this to save the day from FRS, the meaning of which is still a mystery.  Perhaps it means "effing radical sauce" but that would be false advertising, except for the "effing" part.  Anyways, I like mocha, I like cafes, I like taurine and ginseng and l-carnitine and whatever other crazy stuff they use to keep people up at night.  This has got to be a win, right?

No.  Ginseng is not good with coffee.  Trust me on this one.

Mission failed.  Long night ahead.

Nealon's new baby lullaby. . .

. . . is the timer music to "Jeopardy."  Alex Trebek, what CAN'T you do?

Not quite a rock star. . .

So, I tried to be real creative and build Nealon a drum kit out of pots, pans, a footstool, and some duct tape. Unfortunately, Nealon didn't bring his "A" game, and all we got was this:

Attempt number 1:

Attempt number 2:

Well, he probably plays as well as I can on the drums, so who knows where he'll be in two or three years.  (please make me money)

Writing a paper, dreaming about the aina. . .

So I'm looking at Hawaiian Air for tickets to Honolulu after the bar. . . the cheapest time would be for me to fly out on my birthday, August 10, and come back 10 days later.  $360 round trip. . . so sweet.  But I'm broke as a joke right now, so I can't be dropping $720 on a plane flight.

I haven't been home in a year and 3 months, and I know that even if I go back, it won't be the same, since my dad lives on Oahu now and I hardly talk to people from high school.  It's not like the old days, where I'd kick it with Rex and Lloyd down at Big Beach or Wailea Beach, get pounded by some waves and eat some ono grindz afterwards.

Eva, let me know when you going back home, so I can kick it with some kama'aina other than my family.  Plus, I have no effin clue where to go in Oahu, so I'm basically like a tourist.  I'd probably do something dumb like go to Pearlridge or Ala Moana and just be bored.  And the Safeway in Manoa too. . . which is a MONSTROSITY.

Here's my wish list (mostly food-related):

Hang out at the beach.

Eat loco moco.

Eat Portuguese roast beef.

Eat Chinese food (REAL chinese food), real dim sum.

Go to Curry House, eat curry with cheddar cheese (we should do the challenge!).

Go karaoke at a noraebang.

Eat Japanese food.

Eat Korean food.

Talk pidgin and confuse the bejeesus out of Rachel.

Things I don't want to do:

Go to Waikiki.

Talk to lawyers (well, maybe, I might want to job hunt).

The height of your career. . .

Just chatting with my brother today, and in the midst of talking about humorous comments on the Internet:

(9:08:11 PM) Christian: how can people be so clever
(9:08:11 PM) Christian: lol
(9:09:08 PM) Chris: monkeys, shakespeare
(9:09:19 PM) Christian: yo that's b******* [ed.- redacted]
(9:09:30 PM) Christian: monkeys could never type shakespeare

(9:09:47 PM) Chris: it's just a matter of time O_O
(9:10:04 PM) Chris: i wish someone would fund that as empirical research
(9:10:12 PM) Chris: like set up a permanent trust for it
(9:10:23 PM) Chris: i'd be the lawyer for that

(9:10:35 PM) Christian: haha

And then. . . I really thought about it.  I WOULD love to be the lawyer to set up a self-perpetuating trust funding the collection of empirical data on monkeys trying to write Shakespeare.  If only I had the time to do the math, but I'll write some scratch notes:

"n" monkeys @ $"A" each.  (average lifespan of "a" years)

"n" typewriters @ $"B" each. (average lifetime of "b" years)

"x" sq. ft. of office space @ $"C", where "x = y*n". ("y" = sq. ft./monkey)

"r" = interest rate needed to self-perpetuate, where "r = i + c" ("i" = inflation, "c" = interest needed to recoup "n($A+$B) + x*$C")

I'll think about this more later. . . but man, I think after I did that, I could probably end my legal career.  Which is what I want to do ASAP anyways.  Honorably, of course.

Edit:  There's a probability discussion for this happening on Wikipedia:  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Infinite_monkey_theorem.  Of course, that only solves half of my problem.